1. Pregnant Loser Self-Pitying Pie (Flambe): A mincemeat pie with a rolled oats crust. It's...on fire?!
2. Carmine Heifer: IT GIVES YOU ENERGGGGGGY!!!
3. The Lizard and I: A small green lizard. Yes, it's alive.
4. Dancer's Belt: When you have Certain Dangling Anatomy, this will support you in all the right ways and places.
5. Corn: A raw ear of corn. Shuck it!
6. The Rum Tug Tugger: A tabby cat plush with an especially fluffy neck ruff and tight leather pants. The tag around it's neck says "The Rum Tug Tugger".
7. Death Note: A black notebook with the words DEATH NOTE written across the front. The first page reads "The human whose name is written in this note shall die." Luckily (or unluckily) it's just an ordinary, if edgy, notebook.
8. Neeps and Tatties: A Scottish comfort dish of mashed turnips and potatoes with herbs.
9. Doctor's Costume: The package says it's a doctor's costume, but what kind of doctor dresses like this?
10. French Flag: A large French flag on a long flagpole. Seems like it'd be fun to wave around.
11. Don Juan Triumphant: The book and music to a show called "Don Juan Triumphant".
12. Red Cape: The cape as red as blood. It's very warm.
13. Doctor's Costume: The package says it's a doctor's costume, but what kind of doctor dresses like this?
14. Glo Tape: Glow in the dark tape. Makes it easy to hit those marks during a blackout!
15. A Chess Board: A simple chess board. For some reason it makes you want to run away.
16. Rainbow Fantasy Jacket: A coat of many colors! It is red and yellow and green and brown and blue...
17. A Sunday Afternoon: A painting of a peaceful Sunday afternoon in the park. The brushwork on the peoples' hats is particularly impressive.
18. Top Hat & Cane: A black top hat with a matching cane. You could probably perform a nice dance number with them.
19. Red Cape: The cape as red as blood. It's very warm.
20. Café Con Leche: A hot cup of coffee, already lightened and sweetened with condensed milk.
21. Elephant? Tea Cozy: Handknit with lots of love.